CHAPTER 3 — THE ANSWER I COULDN’T FORGIVE
I turned away from him.
“Get out.”
“Maren.”
“Get out.”
“I need you to understand—”
“I understand perfectly.”
“No. You don’t.”
I looked back at him.
“Then explain how choosing another child over the birth of your own son is supposed to sound better the second time.”
His face hardened for the first time.
“I did not choose June over Theo.”
“You weren’t here.”
“I know.”
“That is what choosing looks like.”
Reid stepped closer but stopped well short of the bed.
“Theo had you.”
I laughed bitterly.
“What a comfort.”
“He had your mother. Doctors. Nurses.”
“He didn’t have his father.”
“I know that.”
“Stop saying you know.”
My voice rose.
Theo stirred.
I immediately lowered it.
Reid looked toward our son.
“I was trying to get back.”
“Then why didn’t you?”
“Because June had no one.”
I stared at him.
He continued.
“When I got there, Tessa was unconscious.”
His voice was quieter now.
“They took her into surgery almost immediately. Nobody would tell June what was happening because nobody knew yet.”
I said nothing.
“She sat in a plastic chair outside the emergency room with her backpack in her lap. A police officer gave her apple juice. Every time someone came through the doors, she thought it was her mother.”
Reid swallowed.
“When I introduced myself, she stared at me for almost a minute.”
“Because you look like Miles.”
“Yes.”
“What did she know about Miles?”
“Pictures. Videos. Tessa kept all of it.”
He rubbed the back of his neck.
“She called me Daddy the first time she saw me.”
Something twisted inside me.
“I corrected her.”
His voice cracked.
“I kept saying, ‘I’m Uncle Reid. I’m Daddy’s brother.’ But she was terrified.”
Reid looked at the floor.
“When social services arrived, they said if they couldn’t verify a family placement, June might have to spend the night in emergency foster care.”
I looked at him.
“You expect me to feel guilty now?”
“No.”
His answer came immediately.
“No. I expect you to be furious with me.”
That shut me up.
“I should have told you three weeks ago.”
He continued.
“I should never have let this become a secret.”
“Yes.”
“I should have charged my phone.”
“Yes.”
“I should have had a backup plan.”
“Yes.”
“I should have been here when Theo was born.”
My throat tightened.
“But when that caseworker asked me whether I was willing to remain with June until they could verify placement…”
He stopped.
“I looked at her.”
His eyes were wet.
“She was four years old, Maren.”
I didn’t want to hear it.
“She was holding a photograph of Miles.”
I looked toward the hall.
“The one she had when you came in?”
“Yes.”
“I could not stand up and say, ‘Sorry. I have somewhere more important to be.'”
My anger flared.
“I was giving birth.”
“I know.”
“You did have somewhere more important to be.”
“I had two places I needed to be.”
That was the sentence that finally broke something in me.
Because it sounded true.
And I did not want it to be true.
I wanted a villain.
A liar.
A cheater.
A selfish husband.
Instead, I had a man who had failed me for a reason I could almost understand.
Almost was not enough.
“Leave,” I said again.
This time, he nodded.
He bent toward Theo.
Then stopped before touching him.
“Can I…”
I looked at our son.
Then at Reid.
“You missed everything else.”
His face collapsed.
I hated myself as soon as I said it.
But I didn’t take it back.
Reid stepped away.
“I’ll be outside.”
When the door closed, I cried for the first time since Theo’s birth.
Not loud.
Not dramatically.
I cried into my son’s blanket so nobody would hear.
Note: This story is a work of fiction inspired by real events. Names, characters, and details have been altered. Any resemblance is coincidental. The author and publisher disclaim accuracy, liability, and responsibility for interpretations or reliance. All images are for illustration purposes only.
